Post 3

My Portuguese Sucks!

Despite my efforts, my Portuguese skills are still pretty basic and I am consistently putting my foot in my mouth. Misunderstanding a single word can make you look like a real jack ass. Here's a good example from Saturday night when the boys and I were heading out to watch the GSP fight:

Indiuzinho shouted at me from the bottom of the gym stairs and told me to shout to some guy nicknamed Banana (His dad owns a banana plantation). Since he was about to work all night as a doorman I assumed he was asking me for a banana. So I shouted back, "No! I dont have any bananas! I only have apples! But you can have one, it's on top of my bed!" He gave me a WTF look and appeared in the car moments later sans apple pretty eager to get the joke out. I have made many mistakes (just the night before I mistakenly asked the tapioca girl to get down on all fours rather than 'is that four reals?') but I have a feeling this one is going to resound.

The worst is when people don't realize I'm not Brazilian, but think I'm just retarded. Example:

I had been training in a jiu jitsu class for about 2 weeks when someone asked me if I wasn't Brazilian. I confirmed that I live in the U.S. and added a little indignantly that I'm not 'retardo', just foreign. Unfortunately, the word I was looking for was 'retarDAdo'. Dammit! I'm reminded of The Hangover "...well tell that to Rainman because he practically bankrupted a casino and he was a ra-tard!"

A Weekend at Banana's

For the Easter holiday Andrew, Erick, Danilo, and I all went to Banana's house in a small town a couple hours from here. After meeting the family and getting settled into our room overlooking the pool, Banana got a fire going in preparation for a 'churrasco' and Erick and I started working on a buzz that was going to see us through till a little past 7 am.

A view of the pool and patio from the guest house

Banana lights up the BBQ

A little later, a troop of Banana's friends showed up to help cook the meet and get us through the cases of beer. The food was exceptional and after an inebriated swim, we all took off for a club in a neighboring town at the reasonable hour of 1 am.

The early stages of the churrasco. You may recognize Erick, Andrew, and Danilo on the left

At around 6 am we spilled out of the club. Erick and Danilo were waiting to pound some guys for who knows what reason, Andrew was beginning to wilt under the rising sun, and Banana took off to look for his car. Fortunately, Erick and Danilo got distracted from their impending brawl as a debate started as to who's girl was the best looking. Banana showed up and we took off for home as the debate shifted from quality to quantity.

The rest of the weekend continued in this fashion culminating with a costume party in the local town square that relocated to a club at around midnight. Partying in Brazil seems to be a right of the people, and the police are there to enforce it. Most of Banana's friends dressed up as elves or something and as we made our way into the square with two of them dancing in the bed of pick-up next to a mounted 5 foot speaker and another standing through the sunroof of Banana's car with a forty in his hand the cops just nodded their heads. God dammit I wish I had a picture of that but my camera battery was dead and I was laughing too hysterically to be able to focus it anyway. Fortunately, the club closed 'early' and we made our way back home at around 430.

Erick's the goon in the musketeer outfit, I'm Pelé, and Danilo's wearing the Jason mask

Later that day we drove back to Curitiba, struggling to return to the time zone we never physically left. I've only got another two months left here but I hope we make another trip to the Banana plantation.

Parks and Gardens

We've had a couple weeks of nice weather so I've been spending a lot of time in the local park either chilling with the boys or running. I don't know if it's just me but I swear the sky is bluer here. Check it out:

Parque Barigui, about a mile from the gym

A couple days ago there was a holiday so this guy named 'vinte e dois' (22), which is like a slang name for crazy, took a couple of us to the botanical gardens. This guy is definitely a little crazy but he's pretty hilarious. He has these spells were he just starts cracking up for no reason or stares off into space only two come back a minute later with a shake of his head. This happened shortly after I took this picture:

Andrew, Dinis, Indiuzinho, and 22 in the Botanical Gardens

The other day we were getting dinner and 22 got a phone call from his Spanish girlfriend, who has another week left on her tourist visa and whom he says is crazy. 22 looked a little concerned and when he got off the phone he told us that she's pregnant. We each took a turn to swear or spit in commiseration but he just shrugged and said, "Well, I'm not gonna let that get me down" and that was the end of it. ha!

I've been neglecting this blog for the past couple weeks but the next month should be pretty exciting. Marcão and Indiuzinho have fights and Andrew and I are going to the Amazon. Keep in touch!

Gym Tour and Fight Highlights

This second post is a lot shorter than the first but... it has THREE videos!

Pretty cosy, eh? OK, time to recap. Two weekends ago (March 13th) three of the guys, Mario, Bruno, and Marcão, had MMA fights. The day before the fight, a lot of us went downtown to see the weigh-ins. We had some time to kill beforehand so we got some drinks and chilled outside, keeping catcalls to a minimum.

Downtown Curitiba

The weigh-in was held in a hotel and was exactly like what you see on TV--a bunch of starved, grumpy fighters squaring off in front of the press. Bruno and Marcão only dropped about 5 kilos but Mario shed at least 10. No wonder that guy was uptight all week. Afterwards, while the guys were waiting to be interviewed we all just hung out in the lobby helping ourselves to the free espresso. Someone also found a pot of candy that was empty minutes later. I'm sure the Sheraton staff loved it. ha!

A classy bunch

OK, on to the fights! Three fights, three wins--all in the first round, all by knockout or submission. Here's a highlight video Andrew made of the weigh-in, the guys warming up before the fight, and the fights themselves. In the video, Bruno is the one with the tattoos and black trunks, Mario's the tall one wearing camo trunks, and Marcão is the dark one with the blue boxing shorts.

Pretty bad ass, eh? If you want to see a fight in its entirety click on a link: Mario, Bruno, Marcão.

If you remember Gustavo from my previous posting, he was up to his old tricks at this event too. He somehow invited himself ringside and spent the duration of the fight chatting up one of the ring girls. I took a picture but it didn't turn out well. However, I did get a picture of another guy, Renato, standing with them after the fights. Im not sure how Gustavo does it but the blonde on Renato's left was sneaking around the gym at like 3 in the morning.

Reading is for suckers so to end this post here's another video. Some background for the first clip: Bruno's in the yellow shirt talking to the brunette, his girlfriend's the blonde sitting in the front row looking back.

End of Week 1

Today marks the end of my first week here in Brazil and five days living in the CM System gym in Curitiba. A lot has actually happened in this week so I figure today is as good a day as any to finally create a record. Here it goes.

I flew into São Paulo last Wednesday and spent a couple days in my old apartment which I haven't seen in about 15 years since we left Brazil. I stayed with a friend of the family that lived in the same building as us so it was great to catch up. Despite having lived in São Paulo for 4 years when I was younger I completely forgot all my Portuguese. Fortunately, I hatched the idea of one day returning to Brazil last November (while I was cooped up in my parents apartment after losing that Thai boxing fight) and started studying Portuguese then.

Scenery from the bus ride to Curitiba from São Paulo

So after my two days in São Paulo, I caught a bus through the jungle down to Curitiba. Once we were out of the city the landscape was incredible. Another bike trip, Nic? After about 6 hours I arrived in Curitiba, the largest city in the province, and made my way to the gym. My roommate, Andrew, whom I met in Thailand wasn't at the gym so I met a couple of pro fighters who live here. Seconds after introducing himself, this guy Baby throws the equivalent of Brazil's GQ at me and brags that his roommate, Gustavo, slept with one of the girls featured on the cover (he indicates which one in the next photo). As it turns out, Gustavo, who's only 22 years old, is a jiu-jitsu prodigy. He's won the world jiu-jitsu championship 5 times for all belts except black but he's preparing for the next black belt tournament to be held in May in California.

Gustavo

Last weekend I went out with Andrew and a couple of the other guys sleeping across the hall, Dinis and Big Joe, to a tower overlooking the city. Curitiba is Brazil's model city and after living in São Paulo I can see why. There's no trash on the street, great public transportation, lots of parks, and an astounding concentration of beautiful women.

Left to right: Big Joe, Myself, Andrew, and Dinis in a tower overlooking Curitiba

Not surprisingly, a lot of the fighters work as bouncers on the weekends to earn some extra cash. Big Joe and the clubs future star, 16 year old Mateus, invited Andrew and I to the bar they were bouncing and got us in without cover. Damn, cover at a bar? If you want to party hard, Brazil is the place to be. Bars and clubs here usually close around 5 am and sometimes later and yet the guys that work on the weekdays still make it to 1030 training the next day. Out of curiosity I asked the guys if it is conceivable that someone who is 5'10'' 150lb, such as myself, work security and they assured me they could hook it up. I think it'd be a pretty cool experience but working till 5 am? Damn...

Training stared again on Monday and, fortunately, the schedule here is a lot more manageable than it was in Thailand. The exact schedule varies from day to day, but its something like this. Vale todo, which is what mma comes from, is at 1030, followed by jiu-jitsu at 1200. We usually go to a gym to lift weights at around 330 and are back in time for the evening boxing/jiu-jitsu class. There is also a beginners jiu-jitsu class at 1030. All the classes last about an hour but they're pretty intense. Right now Im just doing the 12 o'clock and 1030 jiu-jitsu since Bruno, the Thai boxing coach and Brazil's number one 154lb fighter, bashed me in my ribs on Saturday preparing for his fight this Saturday. So, you trained in Thailand, eh? Me too. Bam!

Except for these isolated incidents and despite what one would expect of pro fighters, everyone here is actually very friendly. A couple of the guys here have really interesting stories so in future posts Ill do some interviews of them. No one here besides Andrew and Cristiano Marcello (CM System) speaks English so I spend a lot of my time studying Portuguese, listening to the guys talk, and watching Brazilian TV.

Monday night, Diego, one of the gyms more senior guys and a jiu-jitsu black belt disappeared in the middle of the night after taking all the cash out of the register and defaulting on several loans the other guys gave him. He was a friendly guy but Andrew, who's knew him for about a month, says that we was kinda crazy and had a drug problem. In the picture below he's the guy without a shirt.

Left to Right: Mateus (future star), Danilo, and Diego

A lot of the guys were pretty upset but today the gym had an unexpected visitor: Wanderlei Silva! The gym owner, Cristiano, is his old jiu-jitsu instructor so he dropped in to say wassup since they both just won fights within the past couple weeks. Everyone in the gym was pretty starstruck and some of the girls working in the offices above us came down too so Wanderlei took a lot of pictures and signed a lot of shirts.

Yeuuuh!

This is definitely getting a little on the long side so I'll wrap it up. The training here is world class, the food is great, and my gym-mates are all really cool. If any one is thinking of quitting a job they dont like or dropping out of law school or something, there's still room here at the gym... I'll be in touch!

Christiano is next to Wanderlei, then Gustavo, and Bruno. Baby is behind Wanderlei on the left. I'll introduce you to more of the guys later.