Post 3

My Portuguese Sucks!

Despite my efforts, my Portuguese skills are still pretty basic and I am consistently putting my foot in my mouth. Misunderstanding a single word can make you look like a real jack ass. Here's a good example from Saturday night when the boys and I were heading out to watch the GSP fight:

Indiuzinho shouted at me from the bottom of the gym stairs and told me to shout to some guy nicknamed Banana (His dad owns a banana plantation). Since he was about to work all night as a doorman I assumed he was asking me for a banana. So I shouted back, "No! I dont have any bananas! I only have apples! But you can have one, it's on top of my bed!" He gave me a WTF look and appeared in the car moments later sans apple pretty eager to get the joke out. I have made many mistakes (just the night before I mistakenly asked the tapioca girl to get down on all fours rather than 'is that four reals?') but I have a feeling this one is going to resound.

The worst is when people don't realize I'm not Brazilian, but think I'm just retarded. Example:

I had been training in a jiu jitsu class for about 2 weeks when someone asked me if I wasn't Brazilian. I confirmed that I live in the U.S. and added a little indignantly that I'm not 'retardo', just foreign. Unfortunately, the word I was looking for was 'retarDAdo'. Dammit! I'm reminded of The Hangover "...well tell that to Rainman because he practically bankrupted a casino and he was a ra-tard!"

A Weekend at Banana's

For the Easter holiday Andrew, Erick, Danilo, and I all went to Banana's house in a small town a couple hours from here. After meeting the family and getting settled into our room overlooking the pool, Banana got a fire going in preparation for a 'churrasco' and Erick and I started working on a buzz that was going to see us through till a little past 7 am.

A view of the pool and patio from the guest house

Banana lights up the BBQ

A little later, a troop of Banana's friends showed up to help cook the meet and get us through the cases of beer. The food was exceptional and after an inebriated swim, we all took off for a club in a neighboring town at the reasonable hour of 1 am.

The early stages of the churrasco. You may recognize Erick, Andrew, and Danilo on the left

At around 6 am we spilled out of the club. Erick and Danilo were waiting to pound some guys for who knows what reason, Andrew was beginning to wilt under the rising sun, and Banana took off to look for his car. Fortunately, Erick and Danilo got distracted from their impending brawl as a debate started as to who's girl was the best looking. Banana showed up and we took off for home as the debate shifted from quality to quantity.

The rest of the weekend continued in this fashion culminating with a costume party in the local town square that relocated to a club at around midnight. Partying in Brazil seems to be a right of the people, and the police are there to enforce it. Most of Banana's friends dressed up as elves or something and as we made our way into the square with two of them dancing in the bed of pick-up next to a mounted 5 foot speaker and another standing through the sunroof of Banana's car with a forty in his hand the cops just nodded their heads. God dammit I wish I had a picture of that but my camera battery was dead and I was laughing too hysterically to be able to focus it anyway. Fortunately, the club closed 'early' and we made our way back home at around 430.

Erick's the goon in the musketeer outfit, I'm Pelé, and Danilo's wearing the Jason mask

Later that day we drove back to Curitiba, struggling to return to the time zone we never physically left. I've only got another two months left here but I hope we make another trip to the Banana plantation.

Parks and Gardens

We've had a couple weeks of nice weather so I've been spending a lot of time in the local park either chilling with the boys or running. I don't know if it's just me but I swear the sky is bluer here. Check it out:

Parque Barigui, about a mile from the gym

A couple days ago there was a holiday so this guy named 'vinte e dois' (22), which is like a slang name for crazy, took a couple of us to the botanical gardens. This guy is definitely a little crazy but he's pretty hilarious. He has these spells were he just starts cracking up for no reason or stares off into space only two come back a minute later with a shake of his head. This happened shortly after I took this picture:

Andrew, Dinis, Indiuzinho, and 22 in the Botanical Gardens

The other day we were getting dinner and 22 got a phone call from his Spanish girlfriend, who has another week left on her tourist visa and whom he says is crazy. 22 looked a little concerned and when he got off the phone he told us that she's pregnant. We each took a turn to swear or spit in commiseration but he just shrugged and said, "Well, I'm not gonna let that get me down" and that was the end of it. ha!

I've been neglecting this blog for the past couple weeks but the next month should be pretty exciting. Marcão and Indiuzinho have fights and Andrew and I are going to the Amazon. Keep in touch!